Performance

Posted late for Friday, December 4th

Sorry about the delay- the past two days have been insane, ending with me getting home around 10:30 and crashing before an early morning. SO here are my late posts :)

Friday was another hard day. I lost something very dear to me and desperately fought fierce tears once I realized it was gone. Although I'm afraid I'm going regret stuffing that later, I can at least say that one thing did calm me down later that evening.

After returning from errands with a friend (during which time I realized it was gone), I was still very upset. I excused myself with the need to go for a run, despite wearing clogs to school that day. I took off into the mid-thirty degree weather of the Hayward hills and ran. And I ran and ran until I was crying and panting. And my shoes weren't staying on. Brilliant plan to fight sadness with endorphins failed. So after about fifteen minutes on my own in the dark outside, crying, I had to go back in for my rehearsal.

It took about twenty minutes, but as I stood on the risers with my choir as started to sing my heart out with the orchestra below, I began to feel better. I found that the more I sang and the more I melted into the music, the less and less I could think about anything else. I literally lost myself in the music to the point that there was nothing but me and the notes and rhythms and dynamics. And in those minutes and hours of rehearsing, I was so thankful for my love of music and performance.

In those hours I became the songs and my performance helped me be a character. In that night, I was thankful for the distraction and beauty of performance.